Category Personal

Interviewing (A Gently Stolen Idea)

I totally ripped this idea off. I think that’s okay, I’m giving credit.

The premise is responding to a set of interview questions written thusly:

I like _____________________ .

I love _____________________ .

I want _____________________ .

I was _____________________ .

I am _____________________ .

I will _____________________ .

I think _____________________ .

I know _____________________ .

Answers:

I like making up the plan as I go.

I love summer thunderstorms. Especially late at night.

I want to be remembered for the small things and celebrated for the big ones.

I was born on a pirate ship.

I am never going to be as grown up as they want me to be.

I will not compromise, but I will listen and change.

I think a lot of things are overrated.

I know many things. I don’t know which ones are important.

The Board of Directors and You

The deadline for nominations to the PASS Board of Directors is rapidly approaching. I figured that it would be great if I chimed in and mentioned what I’ve learned on the Board, what I think would be typical for a board member, and… I don’t know what else, but I really felt that this list needed a third item. Mainly because I wanted to show off that I know how to properly use an Oxford comma.

What Do These People Want From Me?!

When I stepped up and ran for the PASS Board of Directors, I had no idea what I was doing. I knew that I wanted to help make PASS better. Better how? I had a few ideas. We were going to change the world! There would be speaker mentoring and education for all! A chicken in every garage and mittens on our feet! It turns out that my chickens and mittens proposal isn’t going so well, but we’re working on a speaker mentoring program and I’ve been working with Microsoft to get your feedback to them about certifications.

Enough about me! More about you!

Have a Plan

KPBB-12So, this Board of Directors thing, you should have a strong idea of what you would like to change. That could be changes to how we’re governed, increasing our revenue streams, or finding a new Summit location. The point is that you should have a vision of the future. Beyond a vision, it would be helpful if you have some ideas about how you’re going to fulfill that vision. You don’t need to have a complete business plan, although that never hurts.

I can’t stress how important having a strong vision is. The goal is to have Board members act in a strategic role. Rather than plan things and implement them, you should be coming up with broad plans. Once you’ve come up with plans and goals you’ll work with PASS HQ and a few key volunteers to implement things. That isn’t always how things work out, but that should be the goal.

Without a strong vision, it’s very easy to get swept along. This is a two year commitment. if you’re being swept along for two years, you’re going to feel very lost, purposeless, and burnt out. Make sure that you know you have something that you plan to accomplish. When you’re finished with your term you can look back and say “I did that and I’m damn proud of it.” I know that when I’m done, we will have happily gone through and codified and documented more of the abstract selection process. There will be less tribal knowledge and more of it will be available for easy public consumption. I’m going to be happy about that. Know what you’re doing. Have a goal, make a plan. Don’t be afraid to revise it.

The Time of Your Life

Pinhole: Clock

People always say that you need to be willing to donate “a few hours a week” of your time if you want to be on the PASS Board of Directors. (They say this for just about anything else, too.) So, how much time does it really require?

That all depends on how much work you take on, how much you can delegate, and your own personal comfort level. The amount of time that I spend on my own portfolio is not typical – that’s not to say that they work less, it’s just that my time commitments come in spikes where I’ll be incredibly busy for three or four months and then a lot of the year things are very quiet. I’m hoping that other Board members will comment here and put forward their opinions and help to add to this article and clear things up for the people who are thinking about running for the Board of Directors. The point is: there’s no fixed amount of time. It’s as much or as little time as you want to put into it.

There’s a one hour conference call once a month. As often as once a quarter there will be an in-person Board meeting. You’ll typically spend a day traveling to and from the meeting and two days on site. This ends up being four week days, in my experience. Of course, one of these in person Board meetings ends up being the PASS Community Summit. So that’s one less week that you have to take off from work.

Skills in Magic

hella dope

What kind of skills do you need to be on the PASS Board of Directors? We’ve already covered one: planning. You should be reasonably good at planning. You don’t need to be a genius strategist, but you should be able to put together a simple plan and execute on it. These are the skills that you’ve built as a DBA or database developer. You know how to make a list, prioritize, delegate, and execute on that list. If you can do that effectively, you’re halfway there.

The other skills that you would use in running a business the size of PASS… it would help if you had them before starting, but they’re not necessary.

The Free MBA

The PASS Board of Directors is the cheapest and most entertaining MBA program I have found. Nowhere else will you find the opportunity to manage a 7 figure budget while dining on bacon.

You can quote me on that.

One of the greatest things about the PASS Board of Directors is that it really is like an MBA program. I’ve learned about budgeting on a 7 figure scale, about how decisions play out, how to think strategically, how to plan, delegate, project, and all of the other things that they talk about in fancy business classes. Instead of one instructor and a few students, you’re one student with many other instructors. There are five other board members, three members of the Executive Committee, four vendor board members, the immediate past president, and let’s not forget our non-voting representative from Europe. Right there, you’re going to be learning from fourteen other people.

In the last seven months, I’ve learned more about my abilities as a manager than in the rest of my career. I was speaking with a friend recently, and he asked me what I thought about the PASS Board of Directors. Knowing that this friend was in management I said “It’s an awful lot like being a manager without the benefit of a company car and a reserved parking space.” After a hearty chuckle, we proceeded to play golf using a corporate AmEx. Okay, maybe that was a lie. But we did talk about the experience. The one thing that struck me is what I’ve mentioned here – it’s been the greatest education about business and about myself. There are days when I joke that I don’t know why people complain about being managers, all you do is tell people to do something and wait until they get it done. There are other days when I want to shove my head in a mailbox and scream.

The biggest thing that I’ve learned is how to listen. I don’t always see eye-to-eye with my fellow board members. But I’ve learned to listen to what they’re saying and to try to understand where they’re coming from. Sure, we all say things like this, right? That’s what marriages and friendships are about. When you’re making large decisions about the PASS Community Summit or a spring event or a budgetary decision, you suddenly realize how little you listened before and how much you need to listen. You want to know something funny? I don’t find myself agreeing with people any more than I did before I started listening closely, but I do find myself understanding them. That alone has made a huge difference for me professionally and personally.

The Round Up

That’s not a ringing endorsement, but there are bad days. The good days and the learning experiences far outweigh the bad days and the stress.

In the end, it’s been worth it. If I had to do it again, would I still run for election? Absolutely.

MSDN Contest Winners

It’s time to announce the lucky winners of the MSDN subscription contest that I ran. There were some great entries.

So, here are the winners…

Shawn Melton

Shawn is a DBA in Montgomery, AL who has attended some SQL Saturday events and is a regular attendee of the local PASS chapter. He wants to get started with blogging and presenting.

AJ Mendo

AJ is studying for his MCITP exams, is a member of the program committee, and has attended a few SQL Saturdays. He’s started contributing to the community and has been bitten. He’s looking to learn more and set up a lab at home to contribute to his learning process.

Mike Peschka

Hey, look at that, some nepotism. So, here’s why I’m giving this last one to my brother. Mike has taught me more of over the course of my career than most people have a right to forget. He’s helped out a number of people in the development world on a one-on-one basis, and he does it all with a goofy ass smile on his face. To top it all off, Mike has done it all while working remotely for a company based in the UK and with an old version of development tools. Mike may not directly be an active part of the development community, but he’s helped more people than you’d know.

The Key is…

It was a typical Saturday afternoon in Blacklick. The day had gone well – I had entertained a number of guests with some of my uproarious tales, a short self-penned one act opera, and a round of polo using burros instead of horses.

The classiest entertainment for the classiest people

After having one of my many servants clean the burro “leavings” from the polo field, we began setting up for the afternoon games – we mainly play lawn darts. The neighbors complained after their poodles went missing, but I informed them that there was no way I could hit a poodle in their lawn from my lawn because I have tried on a number of occasions but we were bear baiting last weekend and the bear got out and I hid under my car for an hour so I’m not really sure what happened to the poodle.

Does this thing play Spellicopter?

Long story short of it, we were rudely interrupted when the neighbor with the missing poodles brought over a misdelivered, but clearly addressed, package. I opened it and, to my surprise I found a strange key sealed in a clear material. With a note from my good friend, Lord Trololo of Ozar. I tried to open it with my hands, but it wouldn’t budge.

This is less than flattering, but I need that key!

I must have the key. It was taunting me, humiliating me in front my guests.

I'm sorry it's had to come to this, key.

When I finally opened the key, I found that it was a device of the USBs. Knowing that Lord Trololo frequently listens to the melodies of Lady Gaga, I attempted to plug my stereophonic headset into the USBs key that he had sent me. ALAS, TWAS NOT MEANT TO BE!

Nary a bad romance to be found

Thank you, BrentO. I wish I could be at TechEd to trololo with you. It was not meant to be… this year.

iPhones, Robots, and Cookies

I traded my iPhone for a batch of cookies. That’s right: one white iPhone 3GS was traded for a batch of cookies. This has been a long time coming.

My Growing Disappointment

I’ve had an iPhone since Apple first unleashed them on unsuspecting consumers. I was happy with the first generation iPhone. I was even happier with my iPhone 3GS. It was fast, I could download applications, and everything integrated smoothly with the software on my MacBook.

Over the last six months, my disappointment has grown. There was no good way to sync my contacts between the iPhone and Google without some irritating third party add-ons for the Apple Address Book on my Mac. The same problems applied to my calendars – I could either have up to date calendars on Google or on my laptop. It was possible to sync everything using webcal (WebDAV for calendars), but it was not an optimal solution. Heck, I couldn’t even open a calendar invitation sent to my phone even though Apple wrote the original specification.

In order to sync third party applications with the apps on my computer, I had to manually sync each application. That’s not that bad when you only have one application, but once it starts growing you start to forget which apps you have and haven’t synced up – maintaining your external brain shouldn’t be a huge trial. Smart phones are supposed to make our lives easier. Instead I found myself doing more work to keep things up to date than I really liked. It wasn’t a ton of work, but it was still extra work.

Enter John

What does John have to do with this? Well, John Keyes (twitter) and I were talking on Friday. He pulled out his phone and I started asking him questions. John had an HTC Incredible. I’d never used an Android phone before and I wanted to take a look.

After just a few minutes I was really impressed with John’s phone. To be honest, I called around to a number of Verizon stores just to make sure I could get my stinky little hands on an HTC Incredible.

Fancy Robots

First impressions of Android on the Incredible – this is really nice. Some of the earlier Android phones were rough around the edges and I didn’t expect things to be as polished an iPhone. I was right: things weren’t quite as polished as the iPhone but they were really close. The icons were consistent, things were fairly smooth scrolling between the main application screens. Things got a little bit slow scrolling through the list of all programs, but it was nowhere near as bad as I’ve witnessed on other Droid phones.

Multitasking was a really nice change from the iPhone. I was able to stream music through last.fm, check my email, and chat on gtalk at the same time. Sure, I don’t normally use my phone like a computer, but because of the multitasking it was easy to accomplish some pretty cool things – I streamed music through last.fm while using my phone to get directions.

Getting Set Up

In order to get all of my calendar appointments on my phone, I exported them from iCal and then imported them into Google calendar. In a few minutes, everything was down on my phone. Completely and totally. I split everything into separate calendars. I even sent myself a meeting invitation from my work email to my phone and I was able to accept the appointment and it showed up on my calendar.

For three years I haven’t been able to accept a simple appointment on my phone. It was such a welcome relief to be able to see and accept an appointment on my phone and then have it show up in my calendar.

Contacts syncing was a bit hairier because Google doesn’t support contact synchronization from an exteral source (my address book) if there are multiple contacts with the same primary email address. This process has been manual but well worth it. I’ve culled about 300 contacts from my contact list. You know how Google will create a contact for anybody you’ve ever emailed or who has ever emailed you? Yeah, I have about 1,000 contacts like that. It makes you laugh and think you’re popular until you try to dial a phone number have to scroll through 14 pages of ‘\/1agra peni5 c0cks’ before you get to someone named Aaron. Thankfully it’s pretty easy to delete a giant pile of dong from Gmail’s contact manager (one of the few things it gets right), so my contact list was free of unwanted penises in no time.

The Rest of the Internet

One of the coolest things that I’ve found so far is that the phone has synced up my contacts from Facebook as well as the contacts I have in Google. I’ve been able to link them up so that I don’t have three or four entries for a single person in my phone. I can just tap their name and have all of their contact information immediately available.

Browsing has been great. Since Verizon’s 3G network is allegedly the best in the universe, I decided to put Verizon’s tubes to the test. I streamed last.fm in my car between Cinci and Columbus. I would routinely lose any form of signal on AT&T’s network. Instead of losing signal, I was able to listen to some of my favorite music while finding new music. Uncanny. The experience of browsing the internet has been remarkably similar. I suspect that both run similar builds of WebKit optimized for a mobile device. Either way, it works and it works well.

It Works and It Works Well

At the end of the day, that’s what I have to say about this HTC Incredible: It works and it works well.

Is it as polished as the iPhone? I’m not sure. As I get used to the phone, I think that it might be as polished as the iPhone, just different. Things work in a way that makes sense to me. Settings are accessed through each application and not a global settings menu. Applications are consistent.

I am, on the whole, quite pleased.

Double MCITP

Yesterday I took the afternoon off of work with the intention of spending the entire afternoon taking two Microsoft certification tests. I had no intention of passing the tests, but I went ahead and scheduled to take 70-432 and 70-450 back to back

I was pretty nervous about the exams. After 18 months on the job as a DBA you would think I could have passed them in my sleep. Of course, if I didn’t pass it, was I really that good at my job? Sure, servers weren’t going to suddenly start exploding if I failed one or both exams, but it would have been a huge blow to my confidence.

Thankfully, I passed.

This was a pretty big milestone as I’ve been a developer for 90% of my professional career. It’s only recently that I’ve switched around and gone with the support route. Even then I don’t consider myself a DBA. I solve problems. Right now SQL Server is how I accomplish that. This certification is just some icing on top of the last 18 months of experience. It might not prove that I know my shit, but it proves that I know a minimally acceptable amount of somebody’s shit.

Pay Attention

Suck it, Gilgamesh!

Are we not men? No, we are Hammurabi!

What are you doing right now? How many different things are you trying to balance? Stop all of them and pay attention. No, seriously, do it. Nobody is going to die in the next five minutes. Unless you’re in surgery or something. In which case go do your job.

I’m here reminding you that you need to pay attention.

This isn’t like in Middle School history when you were learning about the Epic of Gilgamesh and how he killed a demi-god with the help of a hairy little man and together they survive watching the movie Ishtar and end up wearing a cow’s ass as a hat or something. Did you pay attention to that story? Yeah, me neither. This is nothing like that.

I’ve noticed something that bothers me – we constantly distract ourselves. People are always on the phone or listening to music or basically not paying attention. Stop it.

Breathe

Take a deep breath and let it out slowly. Breathe in. Breathe out. Fill up your lungs, focus on breathing.

Do you feel that? That’s you calming your tiny little primate brain and making it pay attention to one very simple thing that it already does on its own. Feels good, doesn’t it?

Keeping doing for a bit. Focus on your breathing. If you drift off for a second, just focus on your breathing. Your mind is still there, you just shifted your focus. This page will still be here when you get frustrated.

Think

What’s the point of this?

Honestly, the point was to get you to stop for a minute.

Think about how often you’re constantly worried about what to do next. Think about how often you’re thinking about a meeting you had earlier in the week, an argument, or anything else that happened in the past. You think about the past and the future a lot, don’t you?

Now, think about how much time you spend focusing on right now. Be really honest with yourself. I bet it’s not a lot.

Have you smelled this finger?

This is really mature, guys.

We constantly distract ourselves. I have friends who listen to books while they run because running is boring. People talk on their phones while they shop and drive because it’s boring. People will do anything to distract themselves from the task at hand because it’s boring.

You’re boring.

Did you perk up and pay attention just now? I thought so. You probably aren’t boring. You’re probably a fascinating person with diverse and varied interests and I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings, but you’re boring the shit out of me. Fact: life is not full of roller coasters and orgasms. Sometimes you have to peel potatoes. When you’re peeling the potatoes, peel the potatoes. Don’t think about how you’re going to have pie for dessert or how your 14 disk box set of Quantum Leap is going to come in the mail in a few days. Just peel the potatoes.

Be

Zen students are with their masters at least ten years before the presume to teach others. Nan-in was visited by Tenno, who, having passed his apprenticeship, had become a teacher. The day happened to be rainy, so Tenno wore wooden clogs and carried an umbrella. After greeting him, Nan-in remarked “I suppose you left your wooden clogs in the vestibule. I want to know if your umbrella is on the right or left side of the clogs.”

Tenno, confused, had no instant answer. He realized that he was unable to carry his Zen every minute. He became Nan-in’s pupil, and he studied six more years to accomplish his every-minute Zen.

from Zen Flesh Zen Bones, compiled by Paul Reps and Nyogen Senzaki

To put it another way – an ordained monk was so humbled by his own inattention that he once again became a student. We all slip up, but if you try you can manage to pay a little bit more attention to what you’re doing. Take pleasure in the things you’re doing. When it’s time to peel the potatoes, peel the potatoes. When it’s time to indulge in your Margaret Thatcher fetish, don’t call me.

This site is protected with Urban Giraffe's plugin 'HTML Purified' and Edward Z. Yang's Powered by HTML Purifier. 401 items have been purified.